My last day as an English instructor and supervisor

So ends another career for Stevie-poo. Sigh.

I was thinking I'd list all the job titles I've had in my life. Here goes, starting with me at 14.

Lawn Mower Boy
Theater Geek (set builder, sound and light tech, and later set and lighting designer)
Music Director (that's what it said on the program - I composed a song or two for some local productions)
Treasurer/Vice-President of an arts association (I was 16 and thought I was hot shit to be elected by all these adults - didn't realize they thought it was quaint someone actually wanted to do it)
Bicentennial project chairman (see above)
Flunkie in a doctor's office. My first real job. I was in charge of getting the doctor's car washed, wiping down all surfaces with isopropyl alcohol and sharpening the 12 pencils in each of six examining rooms - daily - I kid you not. I also typed forms all day on an IBM Selectric: "Clear, cooperative, ambulant, cheerful, not in apparent distress." This applied to everyone. Then I added: "Inquinal Hernia the size of a grapefruit" (if the doctor was hungry) or "Inguinal Hernia the size of a softball" (if he wasn't).
Telephone answering service operator (a la "Bells are Ringing;" my first job to become obsolete)
Paint store clerk (yes, like Travolta in Saturday Night Fever, but I didn't wear mylar shirts)
Cook at the Shrimp Pot (we called it the Shit Pit)
Clerk-Typist (thus begins my federal career)
Secretary
Courtroom graphics maker
Paralegal Specialist
Programs Manager
Advisory Board Member
Board of Directors Member
Grant Writer
Special Events Coordinator
Victim-Witness Assistant
Executive Assistant (oh, the dreaded EA - Sheila can relate - and so ends my federal career)
Psychic Reader (done while floating in a pool in Palm Springs - ahh, the perfect job)
Music Therapist (get this - I called myself a Lullabiologist - I sang tones to sick people - no, really - just sat there in front of them and went, "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" - I have quite the basso profundo type voice - I even was on the alternative radio station every Sunday afternoon doing it by request: "Um, Mr. Steve, could you sing to my kidney?" "Of course, dear!" Maybe I need to lump all these Palm Springs jobs under "Flim Flammologist")
National Anthem Singer (to try to drum up business as a Lullabiologist, but the minor league baseball set in Palm Springs was not really my primary market)
Superclerk (the next self-employment gambit)
Strident, in your face, Act-Up militant Queer (briefly)
Landlord (I stank at this - much too lenient)
Vacation property developer
Interior designer
Bossman (I stank at this - much too lenient)
Business partner (I stank at this - blinded by besotted unrequited love, I didn't see my business partner's meth addiction rising up to destroy five years of exhausting labor to build a somewhat successful company)
Free-loader (I hid in the basement of a rich friend for nine months while I looked for work)
Association manager
Website developer
Proofreader and editor
and now Language Instructor, Service Rep and Supervisor

Oh - and back to Psychic Reader/Job Seeker/Binge Eater (today only)

That's it.

Who else wants to list their occupations? Come on, I did - go for it!